Deciding Moment: Lolisa

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Did YOU check the box marked HIV?!

Every now and then I have to go to a new clinic or doctors office and have to complete the new patient form. I somehow manage to check the box marked for HIV on the Health History section...
Just yesterday I went into Planned Parenthood to get a IUD inserted to prevent any unwanted pregnancies. I completed the form and held on to it like I was told to do until I was called in the back.
Once I was called in the back, the nurse informed me that she would be taking my vitals before I was to see the doctor. She then asked for the form. She was almost silent as she looked over all of the boxes checked NO on the Health History Section. When she reached the one box that was checked YES and saw that it was the box for HIV she kind of leaned over handing me her pen saying "Did you mean to check the box marked HIV?" I looked at her and said yes. She then said "So YOU have it, HIV?" I told her yes. Then she went back to the form but the fact that I had just told her I was HIV positive did not leave her mind. "Sometimes things just happen." She said. I felt like she was comforting herself more than me. The questions kept coming... "Your son doesn't have it does he?" "No" I said. "Do you use condoms with his father?" "Yes" I responded. " He knows that you have it?" The questions continued. I shook my head yes again. "Uh." She said. Then she asked " How did you get it?" I informed her that I was born with it. She then either ran out of questions or just didn't want to look too ignorant by asking more because she stopped.
Im always down for educating people about the virus when I'm given the chance. HOWEVER I was kind of shocked myself at the questions she was asking me when she found out my status. I didn't really understand how a person who worked at a place such as Planned Parenthood who worked with females and STDS on a daily basis could be so ignorant about HIV. Not to mention that there are over 1 million people that are HIV Positive in the United States. OR never mind the fact that they tested for HIV and all other STDS right there in the clinic.
If I was not in a good place with my status, I would have been in a really bad place when I was done talking with her.
To her defense, maybe she was absent the day they did the HIV 101 training and the client sensitivity as well.
This shows me that my work is faaarrrrr from being over.

Another Year!

As the 20th of this month marked the 6th year that I received that scary phone call from my doctor saying that my HIV test had came back positive, I sit and look back at all that has happened since...

Since Tuesday January 20th 2004 I have went from being 100% uneducated about HIV to being fully educated and even being able to educate others. I look at all the things that I have done since that night and I must say so myself that I have done alot of great things! I have worked wonderful jobs, traveled across the world and touched many lives by educating others on the importance of this virus.
I have had a beautiful son of whom is not HIV positive, I was blessed with the love of my life and have a beautiful relationship with him. I have a great relationship with my family who is very supportive of every thing that I do.
I have friends who have woken up and realized that HIV is not a game and can happen to anyone.
I must say that I have no regrets as I look back at my life from six years ago until now! I also know that I have a million other things that I want to achieve and see happen in the future!
I so love my life!

Get Tested and Know your status!

A few words from Daryl!

The new years is coming up...
Can i just say where is the party at? Im sitting here and Im thinking my son was just born, I'd much rather just chill an spend it with him. How to split the two is confusing but i know i want to be a father so i'll be fine. Coming from a good home i want my son to have everything he needs still i want to have a life and have fun too. Still, i live a great life and i'm loving every minute of it.

Raise your hand if you like taking meds...

If you cant see my hand up, maybe thats because its not...
Despite the fact that over five years ago, along with an HIV positive diagnosis I was given directions to take more then one different medication every day until a cure is found I still can not say that I enjoy taking the pills or that I want to.
To think of it, I do not know anyone who "likes" to take medication. Maybe taking meds wouldn't be so bad if there were no side-effects to them. However when taking meds to help treat the Human Immunodeficiency Virus, you will most likely experience some type of side-effect at one time or another.
I am currently prescribed three different medications a day to help treat my HIV. My pills are not that bad, they are the normal size for a pill. Well all of them except for one which is three times the size of a normal pill. Just to think of this gelcap puts a nasty taste in my mouth. I believe that this pill alone is the reason I sometimes find myself skipping a dose or two of my meds. When I skip my meds and then take them again is when I feel the side-effects. The last time I tried this, I felt like I'd rather be dead.
When I was pregnant with my son, taking my meds was the worst for me. Every time I tried to take them I would throw them back up. Sometimes just opening the bottles would make me sick in my stomach & I would vomit before I could even swallow the pills. I knew the importance of taking my meds every day to help protect my unborn child from becoming infected however it seemed like the more I tried to take the pills, the more they came back up.
As I look at my son who is now 3months old, Im amazed that he is really sitting up watching TV like he understands whats going on. I thank GOD that he was blessed to be born HIV negative! He is really the BEST christmas present I could ever get.
As I look at my three ugly pills, I know that skipping a dose or two is no longer an option.

Thoughts

As the year quickly comes to an end,another year of my HIV diagnosis approaches. I look to the side of me at my beautiful son as he sleeps and thank GOD for every blessing that he has sent into my life. Just knowing that my 3 month old is healthy is all the christmas present that I could ever wish for. Knowing that I am in great health and able to care for the little one also puts a smile on my face. I would have never thought last year around this time that I would be a proud mother. As I look at the man in my life & blow a kiss his way, I smile when he catches it & blows one back. I don not think that I will ever be able to explain to him how much I love him for staying by my side even when I can be a huge pain in his neck. I can put into words how much my heart softens when he plays with our son and puts so much care in everything they do together. As the year 2010 nears us, Im excited for the changes and happiness that is bound to come. I know 2009 has brought me enough joy to last a lifetime!

I love my Daryls!

22 December 2009